Okay here goes.....

I am starting this blog as me. Just me; in all that I am faults and all. I had another blog but it felt hollow and somehow unfulfilling. It took me a while to come to face the truth that in hiding behind a “pen” name I was not allowing myself to truly grow or actually let my blog get out there where it could find readers! I had at least a couple of friends who followed and read my ramblings but that was it, so of course I had already set myself up to fail. Something I am quite good at actually. You can’t keep something hidden if you want it to shine so here goes.

This is my leap. I know that what is written in here is only how I think and feel not how others necessarily think or feel. Not everyone will always agree with me and that is okay. I may even hurt a few feelings inadvertently along the way, never my intentions but it happens when you publicly put your thoughts out there. If this ever happens please contact me at the email for this blog, it’s listed in the about me section.

The beginning of my journey…..

My life has taken a drastic turn with the diagnosis of Fibromyalgia this last year. The past few years have been rough with my health and it has definitely been snowballing on us. I have spent more time in my bedroom than anywhere else this past year and as you can imagine it’s boring and slowly driving me insane. I have had to lean on friends and family for support to get me and my family through this. We had to hire a nanny to take over my duties as a stay at home mom last spring as I was no longer capable of doing it. Pain and exhaustion kept me bed ridden and unable to pick up our toddlers or care for our home. I was devastated. I felt useless and there are days I still feel that way. At least I have a diagnosis now.

When the doctors are finding that things keep going wrong in your body you start to feel like you are crazy. First this is wrong, then this, and now it’s something else. I began to look at myself in the mirror and wonder if it was all in my head, maybe I was crazy. In January of this year I landed in the Emergency Room (something I have become quite familiar with in the last 10 years) and it finally led me to an Internist. She looked at my medical history and started putting the puzzle pieces together. She sent me to a Rheumatologist who diagnosed me with Fibromyalgia. After a few months with him with no relief in sight he sent me to a Pain Management Specialist at one of the best hospitals in Seattle. Some new medications and few weeks later and I went back in for my follow up ready to kiss the doctor!

I am not cured, there is no cure. But when the pain goes from please let me die to this really hurts but I can manage this in a matter of 10 days, there is cause to rejoice. I am on Lyrica and Savella, I am one of the lucky people that the meds give relief to, I have heard from other sufferers that they were not helped. Unfortunate but the nature of the disease, we are all unique.

I still have a very long process ahead of me. One that is going to require me to take baby steps to regain some of my strength and stamina, as I have been sick a long time now. My body is at war with itself and I will never win that war but I can win a few battles! LOL! I will never be the same Mindy I was before I got sick, but I will become a new Mindy who accepts the boundaries of this disease while remaining positive and as healthy as possible and living life to the fullest that I can. I may have to get creative but that’s never been my problem it’s the follow through where I get into trouble LOL!

So that is a little bit about me and why I am writing this blog. Come on in and pull up a chair, I love to talk so leave lots of comments!

~Mindy